There are nights when I think Sal Paradise was right
Boys and girls in America have such a sad time together

Sucking off each other at the demonstrations
Making sure their make-up's straight
Crushing one another with colossal expectations
Dependent, undisciplined, and sleeping late

She was a really cool kisser and she wasn't all that strict of a Christian
She was a damn good dancer but she wasn't all that great of a girlfriend
He likes the warm feeling but he's tired of all the dehydration
Most nights are crystal clear but tonight it's like it's stuck between stations
On the radio

The devil and John Berryman took a walk together
They ended up on Washington, talking to the river
He said, I've surrounded myself with doctors and deep thinkers
But big heads with soft bodies make for lousy lovers

There was that night that we thought John Berryman could fly
But he didn't, so he died
She said, you're pretty good with words but words won't save your life
And they didn't, so he died

And he was drunk and exhausted but he was critically acclaimed and respected
He loved the Golden Gophers but he hated all the drawn-out winters
He likes the warm feeling but he's tired of all the dehydration
Most nights were kind of fuzzy but that last night he had total retention

These Twin Cities kisses
They sound like clicks and hisses
We all tumbled down and drowned in the Mississippi River

We drink and we dry up and now we crumble into dust
We get wet and we corrode and now we're covered up in rust
We drink and we dry up and now we crumble into dust
We get wet and we corrode and now we're covered up in rust

She was a really cool kisser and she wasn't all that strict of a Christian
She was a damn good dancer but she wasn't all that great of a girlfriend
He likes the warm feeling but he's tired of all the dehydration
Most nights are crystal clear but tonight it's like it's stuck between stations

These Twin Cities kisses
They sound like clicks and hisses
We all tumbled down and drowned