If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one I got the rap patrol on the gat patrol Foes that wanna make sure my casket's closed Rap critics that say: He's Money, Cash, Hoes I'm from the hood stupid what type of facts are those If you grew up with O's and you zap the toes You'd celebrate the minute you was havin' doe I'm like fuck critics you can kiss my whole asshole If you don't like my lyrics you can press fast forward Got beef with radio if I don't play they show They don't play my hits well I don't give a shit so Rap mags try and use my black ass So advertisers can give em more cash for ads... Fuckers I don't know what you take me as Or understand the intellegence that Jay-Z has I'm from rags to ritches nigga I ain't dumb I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one Hit me 99 Problems but a bitch ain't one If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one Hit me The year is '94 and in my trunk is raw In my rear view mirror is the mother fuckin law I got two choices yall pull over the car or Bounce on the devil put the pedal to the floor Now I ain't tryin to see no highway chase with jake Plus I got a few dollars I can fight the case So I, pull over to the side of the road And I heard " Son do you know why I'm stoppin you for? Cause I'm young and I'm black and my hats real low Do I look like a mind reader sir, I don't know Am I under arrest or should I guess some mo? Well you was doin fifty five in a fifty four Liscense and regestration and step out of the car Are you carryin a weapon on you I know alot of you are I ain't steppin out of shit all my papers legit Do you mind if I look round the car a little bit? Well my glove compartment is locked so is the trunk and the back And I know my rights so you gon' need a warrent for that Aren't you sharp as a tack are some type of lawyer or something? Or somebody important or somethin? Nah I ain't pass the bar but I know a little bit Enough that you won't illegally search my shit Well see how smart you are when the K-9's come I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one Hit me Now once upon a time not too long ago A nigga like myself had to strong arm a hoe This is not a hoe in the sense of havin a pussy But a pussy havin no God Damn sense, try and push me I tried to inore him and talk to the Lord Pray for him, cause some fools just love to perform You know the type loud as a motor bike But wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight The only thing that's gonna happen is I'ma get to clappin He and his boys gon be yappin to the captain And there I go traped in the kit kat again Back through the system with the riff raff again Fiends on the floor scratchin again Paparatzi's with they cameras snappin them D.A. tred to give the nigga the shaft again Half-a-mil for bail cause I'm African All because ths fool was horrasin them Tryin to play the boy like hes saccarin But ain't nothin sweet 'bout how I hold my gun I got 99 problems but this bitch ain't one Hit me You're crazy for this one Rick It's your boy
If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one I got the rap patrol on the gat patrol Foes that wanna make sure my casket's closed Rap critics that say: He's Money, Cash, Hoes I'm from the hood stupid what type of facts are those If you grew up with O's and you zap the toes You'd celebrate the minute you was havin' doe I'm like fuck critics you can kiss my whole asshole If you don't like my lyrics you can press fast forward Got beef with radio if I don't play they show They don't play my hits well I don't give a shit so Rap mags try and use my black ass So advertisers can give em more cash for ads... Fuckers I don't know what you take me as Or understand the intellegence that Jay-Z has I'm from rags to ritches nigga I ain't dumb I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one Hit me 99 Problems but a bitch ain't one If you havin girl problems I feel bad for you son I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one Hit me The year is '94 and in my trunk is raw In my rear view mirror is the mother fuckin law I got two choices yall pull over the car or Bounce on the devil put the pedal to the floor Now I ain't tryin to see no highway chase with jake Plus I got a few dollars I can fight the case So I, pull over to the side of the road And I heard " Son do you know why I'm stoppin you for? Cause I'm young and I'm black and my hats real low Do I look like a mind reader sir, I don't know Am I under arrest or should I guess some mo? Well you was doin fifty five in a fifty four Liscense and regestration and step out of the car Are you carryin a weapon on you I know alot of you are I ain't steppin out of shit all my papers legit Do you mind if I look round the car a little bit? Well my glove compartment is locked so is the trunk and the back And I know my rights so you gon' need a warrent for that Aren't you sharp as a tack are some type of lawyer or something? Or somebody important or somethin? Nah I ain't pass the bar but I know a little bit Enough that you won't illegally search my shit Well see how smart you are when the K-9's come I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one Hit me Now once upon a time not too long ago A nigga like myself had to strong arm a hoe This is not a hoe in the sense of havin a pussy But a pussy havin no God Damn sense, try and push me I tried to inore him and talk to the Lord Pray for him, cause some fools just love to perform You know the type loud as a motor bike But wouldn't bust a grape in a fruit fight The only thing that's gonna happen is I'ma get to clappin He and his boys gon be yappin to the captain And there I go traped in the kit kat again Back through the system with the riff raff again Fiends on the floor scratchin again Paparatzi's with they cameras snappin them D.A. tred to give the nigga the shaft again Half-a-mil for bail cause I'm African All because ths fool was horrasin them Tryin to play the boy like hes saccarin But ain't nothin sweet 'bout how I hold my gun I got 99 problems but this bitch ain't one Hit me You're crazy for this one Rick It's your boy
O beat de “99 Problems” mistura a batida icônica do rock da “The Big Beat” (1980) com samples de percussão de “Long Red” (1972) e “Get Me Back On Time” (1973), criando uma base que se tornou um dos samples de rock mais reconhecíveis no hip‑hop.
O videoclipe, dirigido por Mark Romanek, usa preto e branco e termina com uma cena simbólica de Jay‑Z sendo atirado repetidamente, interpretada como a morte do alter‑ego “Jay‑Z” e o renascimento do “Shawn Carter”.
Na cerimônia de posse de Barack Obama em 2009, Jay‑Z tocou uma versão modificada de “99 Problems” com a linha “I got 99 problems but a Bush ain’t one”, marcando a entrada do hip‑hop em discursos políticos de alto nível.
A segunda estrofe, baseada na experiência real de Jay‑Z em Nova Jersey em 1994, é utilizada em cursos de direito como ferramenta de ensino de direitos do Quarto Emendamento e de procedimentos de busca e apreensão.
A produção foi realizada por Rick Rubin, conhecido por trabalhos com Beastie Boys, Run‑DMC e Johnny Cash, representando um contraste marcante com os estilos de produção hip‑hop predominantes na época.
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